Weaner

wean  [ween]  Show IPA

verb (used with object)

1.

to accustom (a child or young animal) to food other than itsmother's milk; cause to lose the need to suckle or turn to themother for food.

2.

to withdraw (a person, the affections, one's dependency, etc.)from some object, habit, form of enjoyment, or the like: Theneed to reduce had weaned us from rich desserts.

     It seems like a simple verb, but to wean is so much more than a dictionary description. It is NOT such a simple process. Weaning seemed so easy with Lincoln, it just happened on its own. Asher,who is a week shy of two years old, is still very attached to nursing during this pregnancy and does not show signs of being done at all. Mentally I absolutely do not have a problem with him continuing to nurse during this pregnancy and afterwards until he is ready to wean himself. I love the bonding, I love the nourishment it gives him. It is our special time. Here is a great link to read some FACTS about breastfeeding past infancy and its benefits to mama and toddler: http://kellymom.com/ages/older-infant/ebf-benefits/

    But nursing during this pregnancy has become something else. When he nurses I get the heebyjeebys. It feels yucky and wrong and hurts so very bad. It is partly because I am so touched-out that I want and need my own space, and also partly because I am completely dried up at this point. I love his snuggles and our bedtime routine but it all has been thrown out the window. He gets so upset that he hurts me and just does not understand why he cant have "milp". I am trying to learn new ways of getting him to sleep without the boob, and getting him to calm down when he is screaming, tired, mad, or just got hurt. My simple solution has always been to just give him the boob before now.

     I can not fully explain why I am so torn between going straight ahead with the weaning process or just pushing through and trying to make it until my milk comes in again. I had this dream of tandem nursing when the new baby comes, and know that Asher will help my engorgement in those first few weeks. I am just so torn on what path to take. For now we are just going with what happens, I am not necessarily weaning and I am not really nursing much either. What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Not finding out my baby's sex

      The first thing I always hear is "Oh, I could not do that, I just have to know. I am such a planner."
But my question is what really needs to be planned for a newborn that depends on their sex? Why does it matter so much? So you can put your girls in pink, and your boys in blue? Who cares? The babies absolutely do not care about that stuff, even at 4.5 years old my son does not care about specific colors for boys vs girls or what they are supposed to wear. I am on pregnancy number three and have not found out the sex for any of the babies I have had, and I would not change it for anything.
       Let me tell you about the MOMENT. The first instant I got to see my first born child when he was pulled from my stomach and shown to me. I did not know his sex, and I was waiting with such anticipation to   see what life I had been growing inside of me. I will never forget how BREATHLESS I felt as I waited and they showed him to me, and I saw that I had a little boy. I literally could not breath and felt my whole body swell with this intense powerful emotion that I can only compare to a religious experience. Pure perfection and joy. It was then that I knew I will always wait to find out the sex of my babies. Because that moment made it all worth my wait.
        Making sure that I love my baby no matter of their body parts is important to me. I feel like society, family, and friends pressure me with asking things like, "oh, maybe you will finally have your girl" or something like that. I am tired of hearing it. This baby is awesome and already proves its cool little existence by playing little kick games in my belly and flipping around all the time. I could sit here and scrutinize all the little pregnancy details trying to guess the outcome of baby's gender but I am not going to do that. I am going to revel in the fact that I have a perfect little creature growing inside of me and that I do not need a specific color clothes, cloth diapers or baby swing to be prepared to care for them outside of my womb.

Happy December!

It's the last month till the end of the world, ya know. ;)

Well we are gonna live it just like any other month.
 Keeping busy with a lot of birthday parties, and fun get togethers. I start an almost full time job this monday, watching two maybe three other boys! It will be a full house with lots of energy. I am excited and nervous but I think the boys will love it, as I will be incorporating a more routine schedule and school time throughout the day. I am already getting exhausted after a full day with the ones I have, and I am only 25 weeks. A little caffeine and stretching goes a long way though, and I know this new challenge will be a great learning experience for our whole family.

December challenge

I challenge myself to blog everyday for the month of december.

Even if its just a short blog, I will do this, I really do have  a lot to talk about. ~Jess

We are doing alright.

I have been bad at keeping up with this blog this past month! It is mostly because the computer has been broken and it was a pain to try and update from the phone. Welp, we got a new computer and I am gonna jump back on the updating. Things are going very well here. The boys are adjusting and my belly is growing. I am about 25 weeks now. I feel pretty great. More energy, am able to babywear Asher again, but not for long. I am absolutely not wanting to breastfeed him anymore but am trying to push through. He was in no way ready to wean, but I am all about dried up. Ill post more on that whole situation as it totally warrants its own blog post. Lincoln has been so lovey to "baby Mars" its so incredible to see him understand the process and treat my belly as the baby it is going to be. The Pace family is doing great and Ill post some pic updates very soon! Happy Holidays!

Silly pregnancy smells

Random odd pregnancy super sense. This time around fresh cut grass smells distinctly strong of ONIONS! Every where I go, if someone has recently mowed then it smells weirdly of bulb onions.

Hearing our baby's heartbeat

Watch "Baby Pace #3 Heartbeat" on YouTube

I had to record hearing our baby's heartbeat for the first time. It never gets old. That sound is one if the most soothing and comforting sounds in the world and I love it. I wish I had gotten my face too, I was smiling ear to ear. Its wonderful to hear and know your baby is strong and healthy.  The midwife was awesome and our appointment was great. This is the practice I am doing co-care with until I find a midwife to attend my homebirth. :)

Turning my rejection into ACTION.

       So yesterday I called the woman I was hoping to be using as my Midwife for my homebirth. I had heard great things about her, her credentials looked awesome, and she took our insurance! I thought I had things all planned out.
       See in North Carolina midwifery is a little bit different then in Ohio. In Ohio midwifery was a-legal, it was like they didn't care either way, which I prefer. But let me just say this is a SUCKY TIME FOR HOMEBIRTH IN NC! That sounds horrible, but what I mean is North Carolina has deemed it illegal for professional midwives to catch babies, while it is still OK for Nurse Midwives to do homebirths, they are restricted so much that I was told I would be un-able to have my birth with a "legal" nurse midwife, because I am a VBAC client! I have already had a successful vaginal birth after cesarean but I was turned down because of my "risk"!!!
      I couldn't stop crying on the phone and afterwards yesterday. It felt like a smack in the face, how is my cesarean from 2008 still haunting me! I thought I had conquered it!!!! I know I still have options. My husband is reminding me of this, my doula is reminding me of this, and I know it is true. I will figure out how to find, and pay for a CPM that can attend my homebirth although it is "illegal" according to the state. It is just so dumb. I birthed with a CPM last time and I feel very comfortable with their knowledge base, in general.
     So this is where my ACTION comes in to place. I need to raise the money to have my homebirth. Since this is our last child I really feel so strongly the need/desire to birth where I want, in my home with my family. I will find a way to get more doula clients, before this birth. I will find some kind of craft or service to offer people in order to raise the funds. I WILL find a way to birth at home. It is what is important to me, afterall, and they always say "Where there is a will, there is a way."



http://midwifethinking.com/2011/02/23/vbac-making-a-mountain-out-of-a-molehill/
http://vbacfacts.com/hbac/
http://creatingyourcalm.com/call-to-action-nc-midwives-and-homebirth-families-need-your-help/
also this: http://birthwithoutfearblog.com/2012/05/24/introducing-the-bwf-birth-fund/ 

We are expecting Baby Pace #3!!!!!!

 

    We are very excited, albeit a little bit nervous, to announce we are expecting a new baby! Things have been so different this time! I am already about 15/16 weeks pregnant, and knew almost immediately that I was pregnant...before it would even show up on a test! It took some time to get used to for ourselves, and then for many different reasons we thought it would be cool to keep it a secret a while longer. Well, THE SECRET IS OUT! Now I am excited to start blogging all about my pregnancy and our journey to welcoming a new baby to this world~
     Here is a little on how everyone is coping with the new changes:

About 12 weeks along! Pouching out a little. :)

 Me~ Well, of course, I am very excited to be pregnant again! You all know I really love pregnancy and birth. But, this time, WHEW I have been sick non-stop and it doesn't show signs of slowing. I started feeling the wonderful baby flutters about two weeks ago and it always gives me this rush of excitement and a warm feeling of love for my baby. I feel encouraged to surround this baby with love and warmth while they grow comfortably inside my belly. I am focusing on staying positive and being around only things that will make me feel calm and loved.  I am most definitely pursuing a HOMEBIRTH again! I could not imagine bringing this baby into this world any other way.

Zack~ He knew. Even before I could tell him the news, Zack knew. :) He has been very nervous this time around and I do not blame him. He (we) are very worried about finances, mostly to fund the birth, as a newborn baby and child really does not cost a lot. But the birth.... well that can really be a lot of money. He was joking around with me tonight about baby names and I think is really warming up and getting more excited. Once the baby is really moving around and responding to his voice inside my belly is when things get a little more real for him.

Lincoln~ This little boy HAS BEEN AMAZING! He is so very excited to have a new baby brother. Of course, we do not know the sex, nor do we plan to find out, but we feel this one is a boy again and Lincoln feels the very same. He from the very beginning has called the baby "Baby Mars" so that has been his/her nickname. Lincoln rubs on my belly and kisses it and he talks to the baby all the time! Its awesome what a difference a few years has made on him. Being 4.5 he will probably remember this birth, and that makes it even more special. Lincoln also is such a big boy helper to me, especially when I am sick, he runs to get my throw up bowl or gum. :) awesome little dude.

Asher~ It's been a rough few weeks for little man. We have him night weaned now, because I really don't want to be full time nursing two! Either the milk tastes different or is not coming in as much but he tries to nurse almost constantly now throughout the day. He knows something is going on, and DOES NOT LIKE IT ONE BIT. He is being extra clingy and wanting to be mommy's baby a little while longer. Poor guy. I think things will get better for him. We are really working on doing more big boy things and hoping that other distractions will prove more fun then hanging on mommy all day.


Well, that's whats been going on in the Pace household this summer! Super exciting!!!!!!! I will be updating more and more about my journey to a NC homebirth and our progress as a family. :)

Being a doula for my best friend

   It is almost time! I am a crazy mix of emotions for my next upcoming birth I am attending as a doula. See, this one is going to be a different dynamic completely, I will be a doula for my best friend at the birth of her first baby. I am going all the way up to Ohio for it, hoping to be there from 38 weeks until after her baby is born.
   Heather, my sister, and I have been a trio of friends for over 10 years now!  We have been through so many things together, including our crazy rebellious teen years, my marriage, and the birth of my two sons. She has been an ever faithful ear to listen to all my crazy birth rants and has taken it into her own hands to become educated and aware of her options for her first birth.Seriously, this girl new more about birth before ever even conceiving then most people do that have children of their own.
  She decided on a wonderful Certified Nurse Midwife and a hospital delivery with a doula (me!) and taking a really wonderful homebirth friendly childbirth education class. I am super excited for her to experience this.
  I know it is going to be hard. The hospital we are going to is not exactly known for being natural birth friendly. I know that we will have to fight for her right to birth her way. I know that she will be surprised to feel how labor really feels, but I have confidence in this girl! Heather is an extremely strong willed person, always has been, and I know that she will fight for her birth with all she has, and I will be there to support her in whatever she does. Birth is such an unpredicitable thing! I can not even guess how hers will be: long, short, easy, or harder. But my job is to be there for her no matter what, and to support her in every decision she makes.
    The toughest part though, is going to be what my "job" entails when it comes to being a doula for my best friend. Am I her doula first, or her friend first? Because as her friend there are definitely some things I would do and say that a doula would not! So this is where I am struggling for the moment. Finding the right balance and choosing whether just to wear the "friend" hat in the delivery room, or the "doula" hat at all times. I will post again about her birth experience. I am beyond ecstatic for her to experience this life changing event! I know it will blow her mind away! :)  (Birth is kinda like that....mind blowing!)